Reimu wins at football
by DorpHolster
Summary: Teamwork!


So like, Reimu was in the Hakurei shrine thing and it was all factual because was definitely there and then stuff happen.

Reimu's door got cut down and the door cutter person said "I AM HAKUMEN! THE END HAS COME!" and then he tried to choppify reimu dead but she rolled to tha side and smashed hakumen's shin with her boombox.

"HWOAOAAOH! FUCK." Yelled Hakumen, but the also dropped his sword and stuff ya know? Also Reimu tied Hakumen to a chair and got a paint roller and green paint and said "Tell me what ur doing an stuff or i will paint ur stooped mask, yo. And u will be like mask like Samuel init blad."

"Argh not that okay i tell the you that it was a villain!" hakumen screemd

"oh bno! But the which one was it? Im bet it was rijno or moses jones or touchdownphantom or BICYCLE!"

"No!" hakuman say. "T'WAS...

KUGAWATTAN"

And he walked in the back entrance and said "HAHAHA NOW TO DO HOSPITAL STUFF" and then he died from heart failure.

Then Reimu was like "Well that's all cleared up and stuff ain't it... okay u can go"

And Hakumen said "omg i must team up with u to solve the trouble that is round the corner by the way!" and then he picked reemo up and they walked round the corner

They saw Yuyuko stuffing some kid into a locker and stealing his lunch money while Youmu and Ragna were lookout types but they looked the wrong way and didn't see the hackerman and remo.

"that's all ruffian like dude." Said reumu to hackuman. And he reply "yes but look CLOSER."

And she did

And saw BICYCLE... BEING SHADY

"Oh no I didn't know Bicycle made the football team we's gonna lose." Said reimu.

Hakumen getted all serious and it all like, evinced how boring and shit he probably was if it weren't 4 the crazy events yo. He sayd "We will combat tham and win and name the hakurei shrine the hakumen shrine and you will fuck off and I will eat all the stuff in the fridge and replace the curtains with curtainz ov my own design."

"oky" say reimu who got a claymore sord ready for fight and hakerman signeld and they attacked.

"Stop hitting ur self, TOOL" sayd yuyuko as she hit the kid with of a motorbike. The kid was probably die but i don't fuckin care bout no kid get dat shit outta mah facnfiction.

Then hakumen grabbed youmu and did a headlock and her head exploded and he taked her sword and put it in a paper shredder and it turned into shredded metal stuffs and nobody cud use it agenst him. Riumu did a jump kick at ragna and he was trippin on acid and he thought she was like, Terumi and he said "TERUMIIII" and did the giant blood wave attack thing and she lost a fuckload of health points and hakumen got a sledgehammer and smackified ragner's head with it and he said "You faggot bitch. Nobody sledgehammers my hair."

Then Ragna pulled the gopd damn fake azure grimoire arm off and replaced with a leaf blower and said "Now i will make a god damn hurricane and kill everyone" but reimu got loads of mcdonalds ketchup with a order o fries and used it all to jam the leaf blower and ragnore exploded and he was killed and he went "grar iam slain.?" And former prosideant jim-E carter picked up ragna and cut his face off and made a Halloween mask outta him. "Now I am president bloodfridge" he said but he couldn't see because the mask was crap quality so he fell down the stairs and landed on a pile of dead losers but he didn't die himself he just took the mask off and went 2 starbucks but was secretly Jeremy kyle show again.

Then they get yuyuko'z attention and she said "wut do u fags want i am in the middle of establishing a evil establishment" and they said "we are here to kill you times 2." And they fighted and then yuyuko was losing so she got the azure grimoire and went "BLAZBLUE ACTIVAT" and then used the super power thing to pick up hakumen and throw him a mile and he landed in a toilet. "fuck i hate toilet" he said.

And reimu got hakumenz sowrd and chopped yuyukos hat off but yuyuko didn't say the ragna thing because he always loses. Suddenly got a clever idea and yuyuko threw a football really high to distract reimu and then karate chopped her in tha stomach real nifty like. But then they heard a voice do a dumb shit pose and jump twenty ft high and go "EEEEEIIIIIIEE" and caught the ball and it was bicycle.

"i have made the god damn college football team and im gonna score all the goals against the other team from gamefaqs or something.

"Football is the of for gay dumb fool" reimu laughed.

"Ur just saying that because ur a fat. Go microwave cake u fat." Bicycle speakd.

Reimu got sad because was mean.

And then bicycle said "man i don't even fuckkkin like ghostz" and did the football kick at yuyuko and she exploded.

Then hakumen came back an he uprooted the toilet to get revenge but he saw bicycle stole his kill so he smashed the toilet over bicycles head.

"Now you cant play stupid gay ass football." Hakumen laffed.

Then they saw the ball on the ground and see'd that bicycles teams goalie had get aids and die in a hole.

h-maaaan said his speech it was all "I AM THE WHITE VOID, I AM THE COLD STEEL, I AM THE JUST SWORD, I DIDN'T THINK UP STUFF FOR THIS PART OF THE SPEECH BUT I'S GONNA SCORE THAT GOAL. I AM HAKUMEN! THE END HAS COME!" and then he rund foward and kicked the ball and it destroyed 5 of bicycles football team minions and they died and there was blood and gore everywhere and they got diseases too like serious shit ones that fuckkin kil ur ass. And the ball was still going across the pitch and some fag got hit by a falling tree and teh ball goe'd in the goal.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOO" said bicycle who started getting destroyed because that was the evil contract or something and reimu and hakumen cheered and they were going to win the football tournament and win the prize money.

"now to find chav football fans to laugh at" they said but all the chavs died along with bicycle and Jeremy kyle cried like a bitch because he wuz outta a job.


End file.
